Tuesday, July 20, 2010

life

life will remain be there to spend..no matter caps are on or off...

When things in your life seem, almost too much to handle,
When 24 Hours in a day is not enough,
Remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students, if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was. The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous 'yes.' The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

'Now,' said the professor, as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.
1) The golf balls are the important things - family,children, health, Friends, and Favourite passions – Things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, Your life would still be full.
2) The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, house, and car.
3) The sand is everything else --The small stuff. '

If you put the sand into the jar first,' He continued,there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

So...Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. 'Take care of the golf balls first --The things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.

'One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled.' I'm glad you asked'. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.'

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Best Email I ever recieved!

An atheist professor of philosophy speaks to his class on the problem science has with God, The Almighty.
He asks one of his new students to stand and.....

Prof: So you believe in God?

Student: Absolutely, sir.

Prof : Is God good?

Student: Sure.

Prof: Is God all-powerful?

Student: Yes.

Prof: My brother died of cancer even though he prayed to God to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But God didn't. How is this God good then? Hmm?
(Student is silent.)

Prof: You can't answer, can you? Let's start again, young fella. Is God good?

Student: Yes.

Prof: Is Satan good?

Student : No.

Prof: Where does Satan come from?

Student: From...God.. .

Prof: That's right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?

Student: Yes.

Prof: Evil is everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything. Correct?
Student: Yes.

Prof: So who created evil?
(Student does not answer.)

Prof: Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don't they?

Student: Yes, sir.

Prof: So, who created them?
(Student has no answer.)

Prof: Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son...Have you ever seen God?

Student: No, sir.

Prof: Tell us if you have ever heard your God?

Student: No, sir.

Prof: Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, smelt your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God for that matter?

Student: No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't.

Prof: Yet you still believe in Him?

Student: Yes.

Prof: According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, science says your GOD doesn't exist. What do you say to that, son?

Student: Nothing. I only have my faith.

Prof: Yes. Faith. And that is the problem science has.

Student: Professor, is there such a thing as heat?

Prof: Yes.

Student: And is there such a thing as cold?

Prof: Yes.

Student: No sir. There isn't.
(The lecture theatre becomes very quiet with this turn of events.)
Student: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don't have anything called cold. We can hit 458 degrees below zero which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold . Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat.. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy . Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it .
(There is pin-drop silence in the lecture theatre.)

Student: What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?

Prof: Yes. What is night if there isn't darkness?

Student : You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright light, flashing light....But if you have no light constantly, you have nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? In reality, darkness isn't. If it were you would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn't you?

Prof: So what is the point you are making, young man?

Student: Sir, my point is your philosophical premise is flawed.

Prof: Flawed? Can you explain how?

Student: Sir, you are working on the premise of duality. You argue there is life and then there is death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, science can't even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life: just the absence of it.
Now tell me, Professor. Do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?

Prof: If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, yes, of course, I do.

Student: Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?
(The Professor shakes his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument is going.)

Student: Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a scientist but a preacher? (The class is in uproar.)

Student: Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor's brain?
(The class breaks out into laughter.)

Student: Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor's brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established rules of empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol, science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures, sir?
(The room is silent.. The professor stares at the student, his face unfathomable. )

Prof: I guess you'll have to take them on faith, son.

Student: That is it sir... The link between man & God is FAITH . That is all that keeps things moving & alive.





student was none other than........ .

Muhammad Ali Jinnah , Founder of Pakistan.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Aay say Zee.

How to make a woman happy?
It’s not that difficult to make a woman happy. A man only needs to be:

1. A friend
2. A companion
3. A lover
4. A chef
5. A carpenter
6. An electrician
7. A plumber
8. A mechanic
9. A decorator
10. A stylist
11. A driver
12. A gynecologist
13. A psychologist
14. A pest exterminator
15. A psychiatrist
16. A heater
17. A good listener
18. An organizer
19. A good father
20. Very clean
21. Sympathetic
22. Athletic
23. Warm
24. Attentive
25. Gallant
26. Intelligent
27. Funny
28. Creative
29. Tender
30. Strong
31. Understanding
32. Tolerant
33. Prudent
34. Ambitious
35. Capable
36. Courageous
37. Determined
38. True
39. Dependable
40. Passionate
41. Compassionate

Without forgetting to:

42. Give her compliments regularly
43. Love Shopping
44. Be Honest
45. Be very rich
46. Not Stress her out
47. Not look at other girls

Easy na?

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Car-nama

Dedicated to my Dinky 2:
Purani meri car hai
Chalana dushwar hai
iss mai bethna to dur ki baat
issay dekhna baikaar hai
bas tariq road tak lay chal
mere dil mai machi hai halchal
karti hogi wo intizaar
jo mera pehla pyar hai
lolzzzzzzz

Aaj bilawaja he pyar aa raha hai apni purani dost pay. I thought to dedicate a song for my dear.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Bedroom Art

My friend's brother did that in his bedroom. Wow it looks amazing. But he drew and painted that all by himself. I want this in my bedroom too...

Saturday, April 11, 2009

Qissa un ki Inayat ka

Yesterday an Excise Inspector came to my home and informed me that I need to have valuation of my new home. And he told me that if I go for a fair way then I’ll have to pay 35000 every year to tax department but if I can pay him under the table then he will reduce it to 3 to 4 thousand per year. Bhala batao kia zamana aa gya hai. Sitting on my sofa drinking a glass of chilled 7up when he asked for bribe to qassam say dunia ka manhoos tareen insaan lga wo mujhey.
Anyway, now I have come up over something very new to me, and I have discovered a new phrase. Kia yaad kray gi dunia….arz kia hai….

sitaron se age jahan aur bhi hain
abhi dunia mai manhoos aur bhi hain
tahi zindagi se nahin ye fazayen
yahan saikaron bayghairat aur bhi hain

***Sorry Allama Sahab****

Saturday, October 18, 2008

بے حِس۔۔

ایک جنازہ دیکھ کہ ایک لڑکی مسکرایَ ۔ ایک بابا جی بولے "بیٹی جوان موت پہ مسکراتے نہیں"۔ لڑکی: بابا کیا کروں؟ وعدہ کیا تھا جب بھی ملیں گے مسکرا کے ملیں گے۔۔۔۔۔۔

Friday, October 10, 2008

Sitaroon say agay Jahan aur bhi hain...

One fine usual morning my Manager came to office and like every other day he put off his jacket and hung it to his locker and after shaking hands with everyone he went to his cabin. Almost in a shouting way he called upon my name and said “Fahad come here I have got something for you”, when I reached to his cabin, he showed me a wrapper of something which was then very new to me just like a spaceship from some other world. At that instant he showed it to me jitney log bhi mere saath aye thay office k excitement mai sab ultay pair wapis bhaag gaye. But I stood there calmly, I asked him whats this sir? “It will help you quit smoking” and by saying that he opened it and gave me some very small “puriya” type thingy which he later told me was Tambakoo Kheni” some thing like that. Following his order/instruction I placed that small puriya behind my lower lip and left his cabin. After few minutes I felt that I can see everything which is supposed to be or actually should be on sky wo bhi raat mai. Anyway, that didn’t helped me quit smoking but at least it helped me in a sense that on that particular day I spend most of my time sitting/relaxing/watching tv. Cuz I had a fair excuse that “mujhey aik k do nazar aa rahay hain”.
Since that day that thing has become one of my fears. And few kuttay/manhoos/_______ friends knows it that I runs off from its disgusting smell and they keep teasing me by offering it to me.

Allah pochay ga tum logoon ko.

Thursday, October 09, 2008

o_o

Photobucket


its a superman!
its batman
its a spiderman!

no its kakapooooo!

Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Un even.

Eid has been passed away and may be i had a worst time of my life in that eid, my younger brother had an accident on first eid night. And it was those which are un forgetable. He is recovering by the Grace of Allah and leaving back for dubai tomorrow after opening ceremony of his sticthes which he got from that accident.
Need prays.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

پانی کا بلبلہ

میں اپنے ڈیپارٹمنٹ کا اسسٹنٹ مینیجر ہوں اور اپنے کام کے معاملے میں بہت سخت بھی ہوں۔ کسی کے ساتھ کوئ رعایت نہیں برتتا بات اگر اصول کی ہو تو۔ میرے اپنے کچھ اصول ہیں جن کے ہاتھوں میں اکثر خود بھی قربان ہوتا ہوا آیا ہوں۔اپنی اسی عادت کو لے کے رات کو سونے سے پہلےاکثر جب میں ۱۰ منٹ سیلف اسسمنٹ پروگرام کے تحت اپنا مواخذہ کرتا ہوں تو ذہن میں کئ میرے ہاتھوں ستم اُٹھاے ہوے سٹاف کے لوگوں کے چہرے گھوم جاتے ہیں۔ مجھے یقین ہے وہ لوگ دو چیزیں سوچتے ضرور ہونگے، یا تو دل کھول کے مجھے بد دعائیں دیتے ہوں گے یا پھر مجھے جان سے مار ڈالنے کے طریقے سوچتے ہوں گے۔ کسی کو مار ڈالنا میرے ذاتی نظرئیے میں اتنا آسان کام نہیں ہے مگر ہاں بددعا پر غور کیا جا سکتا ہے۔ غور کر چکنے کے بعد جب میں اپنا جائزہ لیتا ہوں تو نظر آتا ہے دھان پان سا ایک بندہ، جو کسی بھی عام انسان کی طرح کیلے کے چھلکے سے پھسل کے بھی جان بحق ہو سکتا ہے۔شائد ہی ایک لیٹر سے زیادہ خون ہو مجھ میں۔بس ایک لائف گارڈ ہے میرے پاس وہ جنت کی ہوا مطلب میری ماں کی دعا ہے، جس کے نا ہونے کا دھیان موسٰی کو بھی اللہ نے دلا دیا تھا۔یہ سوچ کے ایک لمبی سانس لیتا ہوں، ایک شیطانی مسکراھٹ ہونٹوں پر آجاتی ہےاور میں ایک بار پھر نت نئے طریقے سوچنا شروع کر دیتا ہوں کہ کیسے ان ہڈ دھرموں کو راہِ راست پر لایا جائے۔

روئدادِ زندگانی جاری ہے جب تک زندگی ہے۔۔۔۔

Friday, August 01, 2008

One wonder but I hate winters. And as compare to winter I am kindda fond of summer. My mums always used to say that summer is the season of poors and winters are only for rich people. So rain in the middle of summer season gives me a thought that summer is about to say goodbye and thinking about winter…huuuuuuuu. I went for shopping and ended up buying a fascinating unstitched fabric for a jacket, funny scene was when I asked the salesman about stitching cost. It goes like;
Me: how much for the piece?
SM: 2400
Me: ok, how much for stitching?
SM: 3250. (**looked at my face for mark of hainnnnnnn????**)
Me: (**relaxed**) hmmm
**a little while**
Me again: hainnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn, kiu bhai???

Haha. Anyway, buying such clothes once in a month isn’t that much effectual on my pocket but dil bara krany mai thora sa time to lagay ga :).

Adios.

Saturday, December 22, 2007

I am Hypocrite.

I see, I hear...but don't Speak.
I do, I don't...but don't 'get done'
I cherish, I renounce..but don't announce
I celebrate, I disregard...but all alone!
I love, I hate..but only in my heart.

Whatever I do, is not what I wanna do, whatever I am, is not what I really am.

Friday, October 26, 2007

Naya post, Purani baat

Its 04:05 am and i am in my office, just wanted to get rid of my internal anger which is increasing in every minute, because my collegue noman khan ullo pathan is getting very sleepy but refusing to goto sleep. Atually we share the whole long night by taking couple of hours sleep one by one. But its 4 already and i am asking him to take some sleep and hes asking me the same thing. Night shifts are not easy especially if ur partner is such a stubborn dude like noman pathan.
Btw we were downloading songs from audiospy.net. Rate our choice, i have downloaded Broken by Seether and Iris of Goo Goo Dolls and Noman has downloaded Chamillionaire's Riding Dirty and Temperature by Sean Paul. Its getting very cold I better get myself another cup of tea, my 3rd already.

Sunday, October 07, 2007

Bila-unwaan!

Last night when i laid down on my bed and tried to recall my memories some thousand of faces and names jumped in and it was like i am watching a movie with different charecters in it...this post is dedicated to my lost friends...
Salman..he was a brilliant student at school, i remeber that he got A1 position in his matriculation but he amzed me that day when he came to me and told me that hes failed in his urdu paper of 1st year in college, i desperately asked why? and the reply was sort of very funny....i dont like their urdu i have my own way of perception and they put few unneccessary things in that paper thats why i left. He died due to Brain tumor. May his soul rest in peace.
Ghazanfar...my collegue at my very first work place, i never thought that we would become very good friends but his friendly and dedicated nature helped us become. He is no more in this world, died due to blood cancer. Few years back before his death i met him on msn, he told me that he is on his vaccations from work because he is no mroe able to work now he had to go to hospital for a full body's blood change. I cannot forget his question which he asked me when last time we talked..Fahad mere saath he aisa kiu hua?....i cannot express the meaning of that condition which took over me...
I know no one in this world can answer these questions, neither can I :(...damn it mat yaad aya kro mujhey....

Saturday, September 29, 2007

emphasizing on sto-pidi-ty

simat simat, nazar nazar, phudak phudak, bilak bilak
kahan khatam, ulajh ulajh, wahan talak wahan talak

mai jo bay lub, ufaq ufaq, akhir talak
junoon e bay naam, rah guzar, her dagar

mauj e shoq mai bhatak bhatak, nagar nagar
self recognization, kami kami, gumshuda bhurar

mai jo bay nishan, jabar jabar, matak matak, falak falak
nahi aaj say, chipak chipak, tapak tapak, rapat rapat

ROFL

Friday, August 17, 2007

Lo kar lo baat

Manzil qadmoon ki mohtaaj hai, until you dun give it a walk you cannot reach your destination. Maqsad amal ka mohtaaj hai, until you don’t go for it you cannot get what you want. Jeet haar ki mohaataj hai, cuz until you don’t learn to loose you won’t learn to be a winner. Pyar lafzoon ka, justujo iraday ki, zindagi saansoon ki, dosti sachayi ki, kaamyaabi khuwaaboon ki aur miracles duwaaoon kay mohtaaj hain…..
There’s no such thing in world jo aap ko bina kuch kiye mil jaye, you have enough patrol in your car to travel but if you forgot to fill the radiator with water aap zaror kahin na kahin ruk jain gay, issi terha in presence of both these things what you going to do if your car get punctured? You won’t be sure until u makes it sure. Don’t get panic no matter what happen jazbay aur preparation he aap ko takmeel tak lay jatay hain. Although I am yet to be a successful man but I’ve got a key and the key to success is aap kuch bhi paana chahain aap ko uss k liye kuch na kuch krna perta hai, devoid of doing anything you cannot do anything!

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Maqaam-e-Afsos!

14th August have been passed, I decided not to write anything on that day for the reason that I was all broke down, it was just another day for me. I had a work day; I got stuck in a major traffic jam on my way back home at Shahrah-e-Quaideen. Raeth was doing a road concert at tomb of our national hero Quaid-e-Azam on blast high speakers singing the song, bhula do bhula do. For a lost moment mujhey aisa laga jaisay mai Mars per aa gya hoon, this is not my world, this is not my country, this is not the country jiss k liye hamaray national heroes nay apni jaan tak laga di. Anyway I am already so pissed off and I dun wanna get teased any longer.
Ending with a sms joke which I received on 13th august:
“Royat-e-Halal committee k chairman Mufti Muneeb-ur-Rehman ko 14 august ka chaand nazar nahi aya lihaza jashn-e-azadi 15th august baroze budh manayi jaye gi.”

Iss joke mai kia kuch hidden hai uss ka andaza her Pakistani ko pichlay 2 3 saaloon mai ho he chukka hoga.

Adios.

Friday, August 03, 2007

Story of an official meeting

Today I went to SUPARCO for an official meeting. That is undoubtedly one of the biggest moments of my life. Attending an official meeting at a very sensitive Government’s department is a big deal for me. The office was awesome they took our National ID Cards and kept our cell phones for security reasons at the entrance. Anyway we had an agenda for that meeting and I am very glad that the heavy impact which I wanted to create on those Government’s officials was successfully done. I prepared the minutes of this meeting and they appreciated that. In the end of the meeting they took my visiting card for future contact. Right now I am feeling like flying in the skies.
The flight is now landing for dinner :)
Adios.